this frozen death

you have taken my heart
i once gave you openly,
with love — and you
murdered me with it.
you owned it,
and me,
until it
no longer
served your needs.
you took the part of me
allowing me to love,
to live, to feel…
and you froze it
into a heart-shaped
wedge of ice.
i live a gelid life now.
cold. glacial.
removed from
all things real,
all things loving,
all things heartfelt.
i am at home only when
climbing naked up a snow
covered mountain.
i am at home only when
walking through a winter’s rain.
i am at home only when
lying unclothed, in the dead of night,
on a bleak, arctic sea, unmoving,
as i am unmoving.
as i am thoughtless
and hollow and bleak.
since you, each of my days
is a living funeral, an entombment
you have so viciously tossed upon me.
i was once warm, willing, wanton,
a beautiful being filled with love.
now you have left an embalmed soul,
a sepulchral figure walking… walking…
walking… silently surrounded by an icy mist,
with frozen white roses worn as a macabre mask
and crown only you and i can see.
the words i speak now
move out of me
on clouds of frosty breath,
from frozen lips no longer lush,
on lips now cold, joyless, mournful.
lips so stiff they are unable to kiss,
to feel warmth
should they ever again
touch another’s.
you have taken my heart
i once gave you openly, with love.
are you pleased now
with what you have wrought?
this frozen death
of a woman
once warm,
alive, and
so very
much
in love.

©️ 2018 Joan A. Evans All right reserved

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